Six years ago when I gave my life to Jesus I was like a new-born baby. It wasn’t my first time saying the sinner’s prayer but I knew this time was the last and final one. I then became part of a group that called themselves the “Body of Christ”. It felt like the greatest thing that had ever happened to me. I had no church of my own and it felt good to belong to a group where I thought I would learn and grow. I can’t fully recall how I became a member of the Body of Christ but I do remember it was through a lovely lady, who is now in the arms of JESUS. I called her supermom because of her willingness to fight for her life and her family, while battling cancer. Unfortunately our relationship ended because of my unwillingness to forgive her even when she asked me to forgive a past hurt.

This group had several administrators but the two main admins were David and Fern. David believed he was called to be a pastor and had a dream to have his own church someday. Each Sunday he or Fern would put up what they called their church sermon. Honestly I don’t remember reading the full message because it was not only boring but made no sense to me. For a while the group was growing because we were encouraged to find new members of this so-called Body of Christ. In the very end, everyone went their separate ways.


When I first joined, I looked forward every day to meet with this group. I remember being shy and feeling lost because I was a new baby to this life. I was the kid that was funny and it was good until I was confronted by Fern. She sent me a long private message, which wasn’t mean, but made me feel even more lost. Later when I became what she wanted me to become, she wanted me to be the funny kid again. Each day we debated Christians and non-Christians on Facebook. Then later we would meet and celebrate the day’s work. I knew something wasn’t right because I felt nothing but emptiness. David and Fern decided we should have live video chats and, though it started out okay, many members including supermom didn’t like it much.  I remember speaking about it with her. We both agreed that the group should return to Facebook but she wasn’t bold enough to tell Fern. . When I finally admitted I didn’t know what we were doing here, I was stunned to discover the woman whom I had grown to love didn’t have my back. Fern replied to my message not with love but with bitterness and anger. I later removed myself from the group and out of supermom’s life. The last time we spoke neither of us were nice to each other. I didn’t notice she deleted me until last year.


One day the leaders had a few of the members including me create a new Facebook page and then go to the atheist pages and just post scriptures. We claimed it was successful but the truth was it was not. We looked like fools and something inside me knew I should not participate in this. We were representing GOD but no one came to JESUS. I remember asking GOD for a leader to teach me about His Kingdom. That was when He gave me Pastor Ron Carpenter.  David and Fern didn’t like that much. They had nothing good to say about any other pastors. David wanted to sit with each of them and tell them how wrong they are about the Bible and what they needed to do. They weren’t happy that my interest was with Redemption. That’s when I noticed something about Fern… she only loved you when you agreed with her. If you had a difference of opinion, she was mean and nasty about it. Though I left the group, we remained Facebook friends for a while. She later blocked me after I confronted her about how nasty she is to anyone who didn’t agree with her. She claimed that GOD gave them permission to judge others. Last year she contacted me to inform me supermom had died. We remained in contact until yesterday.


When you experience bitterness coming from Christians, it’s like a nasty pill to swallow. It leaves a bitter taste in your mouth that nothing but JESUS can remove. It’s something that one can only understand by experience. I don’t wish it on anyone because its not easy get rid of the poison. Bitter Christians are like Fern, loving you when you agree with them and hating you when you don’t. They are always right and they believe GOD gives them permission to judge others. Even knowing this, my time in that group didn’t prepare me for what I saw on Facebook the past few days, all the anger and hatred and racism in their posts. I removed their post because it was painful to see and I was close to blowing a fuse. I saw what it’s like to be bitter and nasty while claiming to love JESUS and I wanted none of that. My pastor has been teaching us about the “gateway to our heart” and I was afraid of being pulled back down that road. I  knew it was only a matter of time before it ended and thank GOD yesterday was it.


Yesterday morning I woke up to the news of five white police officers dying by the hands of a person that should be call a terrorist. To make matters worse, these so-called Christians posted a nasty comment about one of the black men that had been killed by two officers the previous day. They were confronted by another lady and soon by me. I just couldn’t hold it in anymore. These are so-called Christians who claim to love JESUS yet they are bitter like gall and nastier than the devil himself. After a heated debate I was not sad to see them go.  We as Christians are called to be the Light in this world, to represent JESUS. How these people can believe the solution is adding fuel to the fire of anger and hate I don’t know. The violence that happened should never have happened and should never be repeated! That’s what we, the true Body of Christ should be saying. We should be calling for peace and unity, not anger and division.


Whatever color we are on the outside, doesn’t change the color of our blood. When that hits the pavement, nothing can remove it. We spend so much time focusing on our differences instead of our commonalities. Sorrow over spilled blood and pain is what should bring us together while love and forgiveness join us.  Seven innocent people are dead! That should not have happened and I am sorry for that. I pray for the peace of JESUS to cover this world, this situation and these families. GOD HEAL OUR LAND!



I am passionate and filled with life. I believe as long as there is life there is hope and life is a choice. I am no quitter and will never give up on my life. My favorites Scripture is Phil. 4:13 " I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength".

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